BUG-804: Preschooler operating at 340% capacity for multiple days
Severity: High
Priority: P0
Steps to Reproduce
Set up Easter egg hunt for excited Preschooler to wake up to on Sunday
Allow Preschooler unsupervised access to basket while Parent makes coffee
Allow Preschooler to "just have one"
Expected Results
Preschooler consumes moderate quantity of holiday candy the day of and subsequent days until candy is gone. Sugar levels remain within acceptable parameters. Standard bedtime routine executes without incident.
Actual Results
Preschooler operating at 340% normal output. Volume, speed, and chaos metrics all spiked simultaneously and have remained elevated for multiple days. Bedtime routine failed to initiate last two nights. Preschooler discovers third wind at 9:47 PM like clockwork. Parent systems critically low.
Notes
"Just one" workaround failed. Preschooler interpreted "one" as one of each color, which was technically a valid input on review.
Infant attempted to eat plastic egg. Redirected 7 times.
Egg count at hunt conclusion: 34. Eggs subsequently located post-hunt in couch cushions, under dog bed, and in cabinets: 13.
Unknown how many eggs have yet to be found and when sugar levels will return to normal.
Status: Open
Pending approval to close as "Expected Annual Regression." Issue reproduces every spring regardless of mitigation attempts. Exact deployment date varies; system has not found a way to prepare.
Related Issues
BUG-999: Infinite Why Loop
BUG-965: Quantity mismatch during "one more book" bedtime subroutine
BUG-276: Infant no longer remains where placed
If this bug sounds familiar, you're also testing in production.
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